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O/T. What to do when women throws a tandtrum??

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#21 ·
Maybe your makeup sex is good and she needs to keep it coming...but I don't know why you or anyone would tolerate that kind of attitude on a regular basis if you're holding your end of the relationship up...if you deserve it on the other hand... :rolleyes:
 
#26 ·
it could be...

It could be many issues, or a combination of things.

1st off , the two of you seem to have different fighting/arguing styles. She goes to off sulk & what do you do?

Really, the best thing is just not to fight at all, but if you're human you're gonna fight atleast a little.

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus. I recommend for you to get the book on tape (or disc) & listen to it together. Men & women are different, realize it & understand your differences. Don't see her as just a man w/out a penis. :eek:

I listened to 15 min of the tape w/ an old boyfriend & just in that short time it greatly helped us understand each other. Men want to solve problems & get frustrated if their solution is not taken. Women just want to talk, hash out the day's events.

Case in point: We're driving along. I said in passing, "I need to get my car's oil changed." His response, "Go to Jiffy Lube." My response, "No, I don't like them. They're too expensive." Then you'd of thought WW3 started! He got mad that I wouldn't take his suggestion, said "I can never talk to you about your car!"

All I was doing was chatting about having to get my oil changed. All he was doing was giveng me the solution & didn't want to hear about it any more. Once a solution is given there is no need to ever have to revisit the issue.

Look back at your arguments w/ a more critical eye. See what's really going on there. I'm sure you'll be able to come up w/ something. And get that book on tape!

:)
 
#28 ·
In keeping with our throw away society

macming said:
Mine always seems to get mad at very little things a lot, and then she just won't talk to me, and expects me to make her happy again. This happens at least 3-4 times a week.

I'm getting pretty fed up, and I'm just wondering what you guys do when your women get mad???
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Broken, buy new!

Seriously, unless you really want to try to "fix" her, it is time to let her go.

Although I do like Formica's advice. Even though I know it is toungue in cheek.
 
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#29 ·
Frozenspokes said:
Broken, buy new!

Seriously, unless you really want to try to "fix" her, it is time to let her go.

Although I do like Formica's advice. Even though I know it is toungue in cheek.
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Ok, another thing I've learned is, you can't fix people if they don't want to get fixed. Unless there's a lot more in the relationship that your post, I would really advise to end the relationship, but finally, it's up to the OP wether to dump her or try to work out stuff.

As always, Formica's advice is spot on, unless too much sex is what she doesn't want and is the arguing point...
 
#30 ·
macming said:
Mine always seems to get mad at very little things a lot, and then she just won't talk to me, and expects me to make her happy again. This happens at least 3-4 times a week.
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From a female perspective: something is really bothering her. The little things are NOT what are driving all that anger.

I have been guilty of doing this at times. However, as 29er chico very astutely points out, I *own* my own mood. If a little thing gets to me it is MY responsibility to figure out why I am so irritable, and to get in a better mood, not my boyfriend's.


Unless of course it's HIS fault! ;)
 
#33 ·
macming said:
Mine always seems to get mad at very little things a lot, and then she just won't talk to me, and expects me to make her happy again. This happens at least 3-4 times a week.

I'm getting pretty fed up, and I'm just wondering what you guys do when your women get mad???
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I drink........pi$$e$ her off even more... ;););) j/k ..... we usually end up not speaking for a day or two, then speak civilly for a few, and a few after that, everythings back to normal (or abnormal, as it may be ;) ).
 
#34 ·
macming said:
Mine always seems to get mad at very little things a lot, and then she just won't talk to me, and expects me to make her happy again. This happens at least 3-4 times a week.

I'm getting pretty fed up, and I'm just wondering what you guys do when your women get mad???
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Well, it's been a day. Had a new fight yet?

Might be hormones, might be lack of sex, might be you're more of an a$$ than you're letting on, might be you're cool as hell. All I'm saying is that it might be a problem on her side and it might be something you're doing. Either way, it doesn't sound like an easy fix.

The big question to the OP is: what kind of an investment do you have in this? If it can be seen as a minor investment, cut her loose. Do you live together? Do you have joint assets? Kids? Pets?
 
#35 ·
macming said:
Mine always seems to get mad at very little things a lot, and then she just won't talk to me, and expects me to make her happy again. This happens at least 3-4 times a week.

I'm getting pretty fed up, and I'm just wondering what you guys do when your women get mad???
Click to expand...
I have a 36 year marriage..to the same woman.. :) Red hair, blue eyes... :)

Does this qualify me to comment on marriage and / or relationships?

I think so. :)

In my experience, the single greatest wrecker of a stable relationship with a woman is a LACK of COMMUNICATION.

I purposely wrote that in Caps.

Women are talkers. They love to communicate the way they feel and why. Men are usually more "inwards" and quiet, and don't share their feelings like females do easily.

Example: Two women just met in a school seminar. Within minutes they are chatting away over coffee like old friends, sharing things that men could never tell their best mates.

Most men have to push themselves to talk like a woman normally does. Women are emotional, men logical.

Communication between a man and a woman is vital in a relationship.

Any relationship that lacks this communication is not a good one and is usually heading for trouble.

You want to make your partner happy and in turn be happy?

Talk, communicate, listen, share.

Try it.

R.
 
#36 · (Edited)
rzozaya1969 said:
Ok, another thing I've learned is, you can't fix people if they don't want to get fixed. Unless there's a lot more in the relationship that your post, I would really advise to end the relationship, but finally, it's up to the OP wether to dump her or try to work out stuff.

As always, Formica's advice is spot on, unless too much sex is what she doesn't want and is the arguing point...
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spot on when I"m being a smart@ss? Excellent! If the relationship is so bad, no amount of good sex is going to help for more than about five minutes longer than the sex takes... that's a serious comment.

I don't know why this thread has been crossposted to the WL. I think it's awesome that you guys have discovered that you do not have to go to the WL to get relationship advice anymore.

formica
 
#37 ·
Kitty Meow said:
Case in point: We're driving along. I said in passing, "I need to get my car's oil changed." His response, "Go to Jiffy Lube." My response, "No, I don't like them. They're too expensive." Then you'd of thought WW3 started! He got mad that I wouldn't take his suggestion, said "I can never talk to you about your car!"

All I was doing was chatting about having to get my oil changed. All he was doing was giveng me the solution & didn't want to hear about it any more. Once a solution is given there is no need to ever have to revisit the issue.

:)
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Just out of curiosity, how should we respond? I mean, if you say you need to get an oil change done, what would be an appropriate response other than take your car to wherever or I'll do it this weekend?
 
#38 ·
trekracer8000 said:
Moral support from an internet message board. Lovely.
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A smartass college student who doesn't understand the most basic principles, like the difference between moral support and advice... how original. :rolleyes:

To the O.P.:

If you BOTH feel you have something together worth working for, consider going to a couples or family counselor.
Even if it doesn't help to salvage this relationship you will gain some valuable knowledge for your future ones.

Or, just follow Samuel L. Jackson's advice in Pulp Fiction, "Tell that b!tch to be cool! Say b!tch, be cool!" :D
 
#39 ·
macming said:
Mine always seems to get mad at very little things a lot, and then she just won't talk to me, and expects me to make her happy again. This happens at least 3-4 times a week.

I'm getting pretty fed up, and I'm just wondering what you guys do when your women get mad???
Click to expand...
Macming, you're leaving out a lot of things in your post. What are the little things that get her angry? If the tantrums are caused by little, insignificant nuisances like you aren't giving enough money for the kid's school and meals, get home drunk, forget her name during sex.... she's an uncomprehensive, demanding b!tch.. j/k.

The tantrums may be because of a lot of different issues in your relationship. Usually a relationship is two people rowing someplace. If both row toward the same destination, the boats glides easily, but always someone decide to row someplace else. Comunication is the key, as some people have already stated. You should talk to her calmly about this, and explain your concerns, and ask her if something's wrong.

She may easily get angry at small things because she's been angry at a big issue that she doesn't want to bring up for fear of ending the relationship. If so, then it's very important, IMHO, to know what that is. Sometimes relationships are build or ended by small things.

Could it be because you're somehow not paying too much attention to her lately? if so, maybe being more romantic may help, not necesarily in a candlelight dinner by the lake (well, that doesn't hurt) but doing some little details that you know whe likes, ask how her day went, help her in house shores, etc... Trying to improve your sex life, helps here.

But, if she's using tantrums as a method of control... more sex just gives her more power. And more power, bigger tantrums... etc. etc. etc..
 
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