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Don't be the riding partner that is short and rides in front and low and lets the rest of us catch all the spiderwebs. :)

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Don't be the guy with a 19 lb full suspension carbon race bike in full race gear that I smoke on the trail with an Avalanche 3.0 and in plainclothes (obvious exaggeration)
 
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Thank you for reminding me of a mod I need to make to my helmet before my trip in 2 weeks. Spiderwebs on my shirt, meh, whatever. On my face, NOOOOOO!
i rode into a nest of baby spiders once. good thing nobody was around while i flailed and screamed ripped half my clothes off. i was more concerned about the mother spider than the tiny babies. Then there was the time i rode into a face-level web and the spider ended up on my lips.

somehow a group of tall riders can be ahead of me, and for whatever reason, i still get a web strand across my upper lip like a mustache. not sure how that happens.
 
Don't be the guy with a 19 lb full suspension carbon race bike in full race gear that I smoke on the trail with an Avalanche 3.0 and in plainclothes (obvious exaggeration)
Hey, I WANT to be that guy. Getting smoked is a given, but if I could get smoked on a 19lb bike, that would be awesome.

i rode into a nest of baby spiders once. good thing nobody was around while i flailed and screamed ripped half my clothes off. i was more concerned about the mother spider than the tiny babies. Then there was the time i rode into a face-level web and the spider ended up on my lips.
Gaaaaa! spit spit spit
 
Don't be the guy with a 19 lb full suspension carbon race bike in full race gear that I smoke on the trail with an Avalanche 3.0 and in plainclothes (obvious exaggeration)
Oh I dunno. No matter how fast you go by me, I still have a sweet bike and great gear and I'm really enjoying myself.

I'm OK being that guy.
 
Don't be the guy blaring your music in the parking lot as you get dressed/ready to ride.

Also, second on the don't be a "aggro trail ahole" comment above.
 
Unless, ofcourse, that's a translation for "oh fck, I can't ride this, it should be easier".

Trail sanitizing is disgraceful.

If you meant simply maintenance, good point.
I guess I should have qualified it.

Yes, don't be that guy who "fixes" somebody else's trail.
Instead, be the guy who comes out on trail days and gives back.
 
Don't be that guy singing off-key with his ear buds in!
I am totally that guy. All the time. I will belt out bad 70's soul all day long on the trail ... until I run out of breath cause I'm a fat.

Dont be that guy who joins a bike forum, obsesses about biking for a month, posts 'advice' for all, and then disappears from the forums forever as the 'honeymoon' period is over and its back to the couch.
Looking at your join date and post count, I can't help but wonder what your excuse is.

Don't be the guy with a 19 lb full suspension carbon race bike in full race gear that I smoke on the trail with an Avalanche 3.0 and in plainclothes (obvious exaggeration)
Don't be that guy who compares himself and his equipment to every other rider on the trail.
 
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