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try driving your car less
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all riding rigid brakeless fixies. downieville downhill. 3rd divide. shorts filled with biting red ants.

keith bontrager
gary fisher
tom ritchey

my money is on TR because his 'stache gives him some chuck norris skills.
fisher would be the first to go, just cry for mercy. but KB is scrappy. he might come out alive...
 

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jh_on_the_cape said:
all riding rigid brakeless fixies. downieville downhill. 3rd divide. shorts filled with biting red ants.

keith bontrager
gary fisher
tom ritchey

my money is on TR because his 'stache gives him some chuck norris skills.
fisher would be the first to go, just cry for mercy. but KB is scrappy. he might come out alive...
Hmmmmm, slow day at the office? :)

I vote KB, because I like his bikes....lots. I want one again.
 

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I'm with you JH! Tom for president!!!!! :D
Gary's spandex would catch the eye of a bear and he would be eliminated.
Keith I don't know well enough, but I'm sure he would be a solid second!
 

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try driving your car less
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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Andy aka Rut said:
I'm with you JH! Tom for president!!!!! :D
Gary's spandex would catch the eye of a bear and he would be eliminated.
Keith I don't know well enough, but I'm sure he would be a solid second!
or attacked by horny bees
 

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TR hands down. I saw him on Porc Rim in Moab last year. He was flying down some hugh rocks, helmetless on a full rigid bike!
 

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jh_on_the_cape said:
all riding rigid brakeless fixies. downieville downhill. 3rd divide. shorts filled with biting red ants.

keith bontrager
gary fisher
tom ritchey

my money is on TR because his 'stache gives him some chuck norris skills.
fisher would be the first to go, just cry for mercy. but KB is scrappy. he might come out alive...
I would win...

Scenario, I am wearing a squirrel plushy suit, hiding in the woods to blend in with the fauna and them floras.
As the three come down, racing furiously because of the red ants in the pockets, I jump out, making all of them crash and scream like girls. I would quickly use my ninja skills and dryhump them so hard and fast they they would cry like pansies...yet, G. Fisher might like it, and that's gay.

I get on Tom's bike (this after I chucked the other two bikes over a ravine to make them land on some trees...) and cross the finish line.

Meanwhile...all three of them are stranded, crying like pansies in the dark, because it got dark, and that is where it sucks even more. A horny goat happens to walk down the mountain, ready for more humpin'
 

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new one...

Andy aka Rut said:
ernesto-you are a sick and demented man!!! and what, no trolls?
no trolls as in gnomes? Because trolls eat gnomes.

Who would win in a jousting competition:

Zapata vs a swarm of bees

(for the handicap, there's no body of water nearby, and the bees are the angriest bees I could find...I showed them a picture of Winnie the Pooh)

discuss
 

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'Calm Down'
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That's easy, Zap of course. The bees would just fly through his ear.

jw

ernesto_from_Wisconsin said:
no trolls as in gnomes? Because trolls eat gnomes.

Who would win in a jousting competition:

Zapata vs a swarm of bees

(for the handicap, there's no body of water nearby, and the bees are the angriest bees I could find...I showed them a picture of Winnie the Pooh)

discuss
 

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I think Zap would win.

His face can't get any uglier no matter how many bees sting it. Ouch!!! And judging from the photo of him above.... it's Vegas or Monterey and the sun is out. People behind him are in shorts, he has at least 3 layers on. If he were to go back to Wisconsin, I'm guessing he would have AT LEAST 10 layers on. The bee stingers would never be able to penetrate that many layers. Slowly but surely he could kill one at a time.
 

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that pic

Andy aka Rut said:
I think Zap would win.

His face can't get any uglier no matter how many bees sting it. Ouch!!! And judging from the photo of him above.... it's Vegas or Monterey and the sun is out. People behind him are in shorts, he has at least 3 layers on. If he were to go back to Wisconsin, I'm guessing he would have AT LEAST 10 layers on. The bee stingers would never be able to penetrate that many layers. Slowly but surely he could kill one at a time.
a friend of mine took that pic for me at Sea Otter Classic 2004. Yes, wearing TREK and giving the Finger of Solitude.

Good thing he left because I would have gone to Trek one of these days, and fought him mano-a-mano in the snow, while eating tacos...

Bees would win. He'd cry hard.
 

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he and I have crossed paths on more than one occasion...

ernesto_from_Wisconsin said:
a friend of mine took that pic for me at Sea Otter Classic 2004. Yes, wearing TREK and giving the Finger of Solitude.

Good thing he left because I would have gone to Trek one of these days, and fought him mano-a-mano in the snow, while eating tacos...

Bees would win. He'd cry hard.
Zap is an a$$hole and he has no business being mentioned with KB, Ritchey, Chris Chance or even Gary Fisher.
 

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who would win between the three amigos vs Zap

BikeMojo said:
Zap is an a$$hole and he has no business being mentioned with KB, Ritchey, Chris Chance or even Gary Fisher.
Zap is not an Amigo. He's a pseudo Mexican. Probably doesn't know when the Mexican Independence Day is (and its not May 5th).

The three Gringos Amigos (KF, TR, GF) would go ape-scat on his bottom with McDonald's and Best Buy.
 
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