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im4Gsus
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2,203 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
a couple of months back, when i got my new Astrix Monk 29er, i sent this as an email to some friends but i thought i’d share it here in the passion forum.

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it all started one friday evening in the spare bedroom…
 

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im4Gsus
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2,203 Posts
Discussion Starter · #2 ·
angus: "mom's home, but who's that big, ugly thing she's wheeling in, oliver?"

oliver: "who? where?"

angus: "there, in the dining room! you blind?"

oliver: "i don't know, i've never seen him before. he's not that big or ugly. his wheels are big like mine, but quite fatter, and his frame is beefier than mine...i don't think he's a road bike. could it be a 29er mtbike??"

angus: "oh, great, another mtbike? what about meeee? i don't like this one bit!"

oliver: "sure looks like it! and, hey, he even matches the color of mom's car. i think he looks sharp! you're not worried, angus, are you?"
 

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im4Gsus
Joined
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2,203 Posts
Discussion Starter · #3 ·
angus: "no, i'm not! well ok, maybe a little. i wasn't too happy when you came along but i didn't mind too much cuz you're a road bike and i knew you would not steal any mtb rides from me. but this behemoth, i wanna know what he's doing here!"

oliver: "hmmm... it looks like mom is getting things ready for a ride tomorrow morning. i wonder who she's gonna take this time, me or you. she took me last saturday, you know..."

angus: "well, i don't care who she takes as long as it's not him!"

oliver: "i hear her in the garage putting things in the car. soon she's gonna come in here and take one of us. oh oh, she's taking him out to the garage! oh no, angus, she's not taking either one of us; she's taking him!!!"

angus: "i knew it!!! she don't love me any more cuz of this ugly, puke-colored fork I have. why meeee??? waaaaahhhh!!"

oliver: "dude, take a hold of yourself. mtbikes don't cry."

angus: "sure, it's easy for you to say, you're not the one who's being replaced. this really stinks! he better not think he's going to share this room with us. i'll scratch his eyes out."


saturday ~11am

oliver: "angus, wake up, mom’s back and look who she's bringing in here."

mom: "hi guys, i want you to meet andre, the new addition to the family. is there room in here for him?"

oliver (grinning): "sure, he can fit in here, no problemo. angus can move to the back of the room."

angus: "NO, I WON'T!! it's bad enough that you put this ugly fork on me! now you're bringing a new mtn bike in and you want me to give him my spot?? no way!! i don't want him in here! take him away!"

mom: (wheeling andre back to the dining room): "oy vey, a jealous mtbike; who would've known..."
 

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im4Gsus
Joined
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2,203 Posts
Discussion Starter · #6 ·
thank you guys! :)

'tis good to see some positive replies. maybe i'll write more often.;)
 

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Freshly Fujified
Joined
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8,199 Posts
We humanized you...

Chip said:
They don't like that.
;)

-C
And you barely put up a fight!

Good to see you back in the forums. We'll have to get together and ride when our schedules work, Jupiter aligns with Mars, and Egg puts down his beer long enough to string together a coherent thought.

Bob

P.S. Sorry to hijack. Back to your regularly scheduled thread about talking bicycles.
 

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over 50 years of cycling
Joined
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533 Posts
Elementary....

And nice Element!

To rephrase whats already been said, and to plagarize a bit from the Element forum....

Don't antrhopomorphize your bicycles....they don't like it.
 

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im4Gsus
Joined
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2,203 Posts
Discussion Starter · #10 ·
Twisted Trail said:
...and to plagarize a bit from the Element forum....
busted!! yup, twas me who wrote that in the element forum. dunno why i didn't post it here then. oh, well.

Twisted Trail said:
Don't antrhopomorphize your bicycles....they don't like it.
au contraire! mine like it. ask them!:D
 

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over 50 years of cycling
Joined
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533 Posts
kaboose said:
busted!! yup, twas me who wrote that in the element forum. dunno why i didn't post it here then. oh, well.

au contraire! mine like it. ask them!:D
Thats one of my very top favorite lines of all time! And it works for Elements or bicycles.
Good job coming up with that one!
 

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im4Gsus
Joined
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2,203 Posts
Discussion Starter · #12 ·
update

oh my, it's been a while since i wrote that little skit! since then a few mtn bikes have come and gone, including Andre and two others. Mr. Angus is still here and still sharing the spare bedroom with mischievous Oliver who only gets to go out in the summer months.

last year a new 29er, Dane, came into the fold, but lives in the dining room, as Angus will still not share his space. as a matter of fact he's all happy because Dane's been out all week having a bb bearing replaced, and he's gone out on a couple of rides - and will tomorrow as well unless bret, who's been working on Dane, brings him to the ride...poor Angus! :p
 
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