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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I abhor waiting on people and try not to make people wait on me. For instance, I met this person at a trailhead and we exchanged numbers and have met up at quite a few trails in the last few months. Well, I live about an hour from him so I typically get up at 6am saturday and head to his house, I call about 15 mins before I get there. He is never ready when I get there! I have to wait 30 to an hour at his place before we leave to go to the trail. Then once we get to the trail its another 1half an hour for him to put his gear on and be ready to ride. We are riding tommorrow morning and I want to tell him to be ready to rock when I get there but not be a jerk about it, any suggestions?
 

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That reminds me of my wife.

Sometimes you just have to accept things about people. Try calling him tonight aan jokingly say "Hey man, get your stuff together tonight. I will be there at 7". Or leave later, but don't tell him. Make your normal call that you are 15 minutes away, and actually be 45 minutes away.

If that doesn't work and you enjoy riding together then it may be one of those things you just have to live with. Nobody is perfect.
 

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Loser
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Strategy

I'm with you. I don't ever make anyone late (except in EXTREME circumstances), and I hate it went people make me wait. I have a friend who is habitually late, this is a good friend, so my tactics can be a bit more blunt.

1) I let him know that being late is a pet peeve of mine.

2) When we set up a meet time, I give him two times - the "real" time and the "Ron" time. Its become a running joke.

3) I relax and accept that when I say 9:00, if I see him before 9:15 its a bonus. I basically tell myself that we're meeting at 9:15, but get there for 9:00.

Ron has improved his on time performance greatly, but he's still late 50% of the time or so. Luckily when he does get there he's typically ready to ride so there's little "set up time".

John

(edit - we also have a standard 15 minute wait window - if you're not there within 15 mins of the appointed time - and you haven't called - you're riding solo. However, it sucks that this guy would call within the 15 min window telling me he'd be late - often).
 

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involuntary dismounter
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completely agree with ya! i hate waiting for people too...i wish they would just tell me that they're running late, so i can do my own thing and show up when they're ready...it really bugs me when people don't have respect for my time! :rolleyes:

another trick...make plans about 30min-1hr before you actually want to leave...and then show up 'late'...usually does the trick! :D

calling ahead also helps...'hey...i'll be over at your house in an hour...you about ready? meet me in front of your house' kind of thing...:)

and yeah...if all else fails...have to agree with wooglin...cut the ties!
 

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Silence! I kill you!
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One of my buddies used to be always late. Or he'd call right before the ride would start and say he couldn't make it (Hes probably gonna read this since he's on MTBR :)

So I finally told him when he wanted to ride and would be there on time to give me a call. I also started a 5 min wait window. If he (Or my other riding friends) weren't there by the time specified, we gave them a 5 minute window, then we'd leave.

Ever since then, we've had no problems :)
 

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over 50 years of cycling
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waiting game

I also have that odd quirk of figuring if a ride is schedule at 9:00am, that means you are AT THE TRAILHEAD and READY TO RIDE at 9:00am.

It seems like most people I run into figure that means its time to leave their hous at 9:00am and head for the trailhead with some bike pieces in their car, stopping at Starbucks along the way, then showing up and then starting to get dressed for riding, discovering the missing glove or helmet or whatever, find the tire is flat and remember they REALLY needed to adjust their brakes the last time....etc
Meanwhile MY caffeine has worn off by then, and I am cramping up from standing around in the cold so long, and half my allocated riding time is GONE.

I have started to SAY the ride is at least 20 minutes or so before I actually plan the ride to start. Of course this will only work a few times before they reset. What really amazed me is I arrived half hour "late" counting on at least that much delay, and by a fluke the guy was ready 2 minutes before I got there and he was all torqued up about having to wait.
Same thing happens for hikes.

I tend to ride solo a lot. Its not as safe....but it sure is much more efficient.
 

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Jisch said:
2) When we set up a meet time, I give him two times - the "real" time and the "Ron" time. Its become a running joke.

3) I relax and accept that when I say 9:00, if I see him before 9:15 its a bonus. I basically tell myself that we're meeting at 9:15, but get there for 9:00.
thats exactly what I have to do with pretty much all my riding partners, drives me nuts but what can I do... If we say we are meeting at 6 to ride for example I usually get there by 5:55 the latest so I can be ready to ride at 6, most of my riding partners get there at 6:15 and are ready to ride at 6:45. I guess with our group Im the odd one out so I just deal with it. But when I lead our rides, I deffinatly tell different people different times to try to guess when everyone will actually show up.
 

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If you're not meeting at the trailhead (where you can specifically say "we're RIDING at 8 am, so get there and be ready earlier), it may be difficult. I've definitely gone through that with people when we show up at their house on time and we not only had to get up earlier, but also drive to their place... and they can't even be ready on time. Had I know they'd be so late I would've slept in longer! But, that just pushes the time back even further.

I think some people just don't pay attention to time and probably don't realize they're holding others up. You could always just call and say "I'll be in the driveway in 15 minutes, so meet me out there or I'm going to keep driving", etc. If you don't actually go in their house, they may be more apt to hurry up. Definitely a call the night before reminding them to get their tires inflated, etc isn't a bad idea either :)
 

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Just roll it......
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wooglin said:
Stop riding with him. If he asks why, tell him.
That's a totally lame, passive-agressive way to deal with it. :madman: I'd hate to see how you deal with stuff in the real world. :confused:

Gutfiddle, you're driving an hour to meet him and he's not ready. Say THAT to him, along with the fact that you're getting up early just to be there on time. If he can't make it at xx time, he should just say let's meet 30-60 minutes later. Also, if leaving later means you can't ride as long due to other obligations, etc. you should let him know how it impacts your ride. Remember, a lot of people have more/less tolerance for that kind of stuff and more/less obligations, so just make sure your riding partner is aware of that. If he becomes aware and still can't make it on time, then you'll need to decide if you still want to ride with him or not.

I ride with a big group of buddies and there's always a straggler or two on most rides (sometimes, I'm that straggler). Usually, it's no big deal, but it took me a year or so to become zen with it. Normally, it's a work or traffic issue for our evening rides, so it's hard to get pissed at someone about that anyway. Now that people have wives, kids, etc. it's become a bit more respectful of time, but we rarely leave the trailhead ON TIME. Once we're on the bikes, we're gone and the pace is usually brisk on climbs and ripping down.....it's just the process of getting on the bike that takes forever. :D

Cheers,
EBX
 

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I have ridden with people with no respect for anyone else's time in the past. It's just not worth the aggrivation especially if you have an hour drive to think about it. It's probably why I ride alone 99% of the time.
Just tell the person the bus is leaving at 7 and if they miss it they can catch the next one, then leave at 7.
 

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Yes, that's fonetic
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1. Take separate vehicles
2. Tell him what time you're riding and the route you'll be taking
3. Stick to the plan and see him on the trail (or not, it'll be up to him then)
4. If there's service in the area take cell phones in case of a route change

If you have a hard time explaining the separate vehicles tell him you want to do some trail head bike maintainence or some trail work before the ride.

On our regular large group rides there are a couple of jump areas along our usual route that I just session until everyone shows up.
 
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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
ebxtreme said:
That's a totally lame, passive-agressive way to deal with it. :madman: I'd hate to see how you deal with stuff in the real world. :confused:

Gutfiddle, you're driving an hour to meet him and he's not ready. Say THAT to him, along with the fact that you're getting up early just to be there on time. If he can't make it at xx time, he should just say let's meet 30-60 minutes later. Also, if leaving later means you can't ride as long due to other obligations, etc. you should let him know how it impacts your ride. Remember, a lot of people have more/less tolerance for that kind of stuff and more/less obligations, so just make sure your riding partner is aware of that. If he becomes aware and still can't make it on time, then you'll need to decide if you still want to ride with him or not.

I ride with a big group of buddies and there's always a straggler or two on most rides (sometimes, I'm that straggler). Usually, it's no big deal, but it took me a year or so to become zen with it. Normally, it's a work or traffic issue for our evening rides, so it's hard to get pissed at someone about that anyway. Now that people have wives, kids, etc. it's become a bit more respectful of time, but we rarely leave the trailhead ON TIME. Once we're on the bikes, we're gone and the pace is usually brisk on climbs and ripping down.....it's just the process of getting on the bike that takes forever. :D

Cheers,
EBX
Well put...i'll give him the benefit of the doubt tommorrow morning and if he isnt ready when I get there i'll express my feelings then we can hug and get on w/ riding.:cool:
 

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paintbucket
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ebxtreme said:
That's a totally lame, passive-agressive way to deal with it. :madman: I'd hate to see how you deal with stuff in the real world. :confused:
It would only be passive-aggressive if I did it to try and get him to change his ways. In the real world I don't waste my time with people who waste my time.

I get enough of that at work. :)
 

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Mostly reformed but...

gutfiddle said:
I abhor waiting on people and try not to make people wait on me. For instance, I met this person at a trailhead and we exchanged numbers and have met up at quite a few trails in the last few months. Well, I live about an hour from him so I typically get up at 6am saturday and head to his house, I call about 15 mins before I get there. He is never ready when I get there! I have to wait 30 to an hour at his place before we leave to go to the trail. Then once we get to the trail its another 1half an hour for him to put his gear on and be ready to ride. We are riding tommorrow morning and I want to tell him to be ready to rock when I get there but not be a jerk about it, any suggestions?
I agree that being up front is best.

I used to make people wait because I was too into my day, trying too hard to get too much done. I'd like to think I've grown up some over the years. Spelling out your expectations in the form of " I need to get on the trail by x, so I need you to be ready when I get there." is not rude IMO. Depends on how you say it.

Some folks I know have little or no time to work on their bikes at home due to the presence of little children and they need some set-up time at the trail head. If your buddy really does not have time to maintain his bike at home, and your schedule won't permit, you might need to find a different riding partner. Ask why he's not ready. Explain what you need.

OTOH, one of the best parts of riding is taking a half hour or so afterward to savor a beer and some conversation. Some folks might look at that as a waste of time too. Different expectations.

Walt
 

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wooglin said:
It would only be passive-aggressive if I did it to try and get him to change his ways. In the real world I don't waste my time with people who waste my time.

I get enough of that at work. :)
Man Wooglin you crack my @$$ up for real. You gotta just know ole' woogie, he means no harm.

Plus who want to ride with an old man who whoops your butt after he rode his bike 400 miles to the trailhead. . .

For real the only way to solve this problem is to say "We are leaving the TRAILHEAD at 8:00, if you aren't there on time, you better pedal faster than us."
 

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Just roll it......
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wooglin said:
It would only be passive-aggressive if I did it to try and get him to change his ways. In the real world I don't waste my time with people who waste my time.

I get enough of that at work. :)
Understood, but it sounds like he wants to ride with this guy going forward, so maybe he should just be up front with him vs. using the "I'm not riding with you anymore and maybe you'll figure it out" method? Come on, this guy's not clairvoyant and most have varying levels of tolerance for these types of things........

Personally, I respond better when someone says "hey, I'm driving over at 8, can you be ready to rock when I get there?". If that doesn't work, then he can always just do what whodaphuck mentions...which is a good plan B.

Cheers,
EBX
 

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I feel your pain but also you shouldn't be stressing out over the issue either. You've obviously lost faith in him and are running out of patience as well, so get things started a little earlier. What I mean is, call him up tonight and finalize all the little details. Is it that he just can't get up that early, (does he use your horn as an alarmclock), or is he just lazy and inconsiderate?

Be straightforward with him. "Are you going to be ready at 7 or should I pick you up at 8 because I really don't feel like sitting around waiting again when we could be RIDING!"
 

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Lindsay
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You think that is bad? Get this, my riding partner is often late to a trailhead. Then, I have to wait up to 20 more minutes until he gets his gear ready. Add a few more minutes of socializing w/ other bikers.

Well, here is the good part. So we get going up to an hour later and comes the first climb he drops to granny gear. I wait another 30 minutes at the first overlook.

What do you expect from a downhiller?

What really sucks is it just takes the life out of your ride.
 
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