[Upchuck]

I'm trying to build a freakishly light XC race bike. So far I have the complete build down to 18.65 lbs. I've already dropped the little ring and have a 2x9 setup: 34/46 and 12-28 in the back. Since I am only a buck-ninety with my gear on, I thought I could do some home-brew modifications:

• File every third tooth down on the front chainrings.
• Cut 1.5" off the ends of the brake levers since I only use my index finger.
• Use Cinelli cork instead of grips.
• Remove the water bottle cage and screws.
• Drill holes in the seatpost since I rarely sit down during a race.
• May consider eliminating the seatpost and saddle completely.

I already shaved all the lugs off the tires, but that still didn't help enough. So I ditched the tires. Also got rid of the chain. I stripped all the paint off since that was tipping me over over the 18.75 lb mark. any other suggestions?
Here's a pic of the bike.

ps. This post contained obvious amounts of sarcasm to poke fun at those who take weight savings to the extreme.

 

[Circlip]

Yawn.

Please search the archives of this forum for endless similar attempts at sarcastic humour related to weight weenie syndrome, many of which were much more creative and funny than yours.

 

[Upchuck]

Yawn.

Please search the archives of this forum for endless similar attempts at sarcastic humour related to weight weenie syndrome, many of which were much more creative and funny than yours.

Yay! The newb got the point of my post! This forum tends to reek of elitist-parts snobbery. I crack up every time I accidentally hit the wrong forum on the drop down menu. If one actually needs to drop a quarter pound of bike weight to go faster, maybe try pedaling faster instead.

 

[LowCel]

Great, mission accomplished. We all now understand what losers we are. In the future I will take your advice and just pedal faster.

Thank you for setting me straight.

As for your weight dilemma I believe the best thing for you would be to keep the seatpost, just get rid of the saddle. I'm certain that with that simple yet effective mod you will have a bike that you will look forward to riding several times a day. I'm sure that all of your friends will be envious of you and your new ride.

 

[lowmach]

As for your weight dilemma I believe the best thing for you would be to keep the seatpost, just get rid of the saddle. I'm certain that with that simple yet effective mod you will have a bike that you will look forward to riding several times a day. I'm sure that all of your friends will be envious of you and your new ride.

now thats good advice for the dude with weight issues!

 

[Upchuck]

Great, mission accomplished. We all now understand what losers we are. In the future I will take your advice and just pedal faster.

Thank you for setting me straight.

As for your weight dilemma I believe the best thing for you would be to keep the seatpost, just get rid of the saddle. I'm certain that with that simple yet effective mod you will have a bike that you will look forward to riding several times a day. I'm sure that all of your friends will be envious of you and your new ride.

Hey, if it's good enough for Cindy Whitehead, it's good enough for me! Thanks for the suggestion. Now if I can only squeeze my arse into one of those cute spandex outfits you boys wear...

 

[Jersey]

Yawn.

Please search the archives of this forum for endless similar attempts at sarcastic humour related to weight weenie syndrome, many of which were much more creative and funny than yours.

other posts exist like this? id kinda like to see those!

 

[drunkle]

Yay! The newb got the point of my post! This forum tends to reek of elitist-parts snobbery. I crack up every time I accidentally hit the wrong forum on the drop down menu. If one actually needs to drop a quarter pound of bike weight to go faster, maybe try pedaling faster instead.

you got that off a fortune cookie, dont lie. here's one i found: when accusing others of snobbery, one must always remember to act as a snob oneself.

another one was: you like chinese food.

 

[Upchuck]

you got that off a fortune cookie, dont lie. here's one i found: when accusing others of snobbery, one must always remember to act as a snob oneself.

another one was: you like chinese food.

How right you, I mean the fortune cookie, are...I mean is...or something like that.
Truer words were never spoken.

One I really liked was: One who gets offended by poke in the ribs, is offended by what he sees in himeself.

And this one: If you can't laugh at yourself, let others do it for you.

Boy, I should give up my day job and write Hallmark cards, or fortune cookies, or troll-posts.

 

[Circlip]

Yay! The newb got the point of my post!

Love it when someone smugly pulls the "newb" card to try to make themselves feel superior. You were saying something about elitist snobbery below? Gee Upchuck, can I please join your club?

This forum tends to reek of elitist-parts snobbery. I crack up every time I accidentally hit the wrong forum on the drop down menu.

That's what 99% of this this entire web site is about across all forums, in some form or another. Talk about having your head in the sand.

If one actually needs to drop a quarter pound of bike weight to go faster, maybe try pedaling faster instead.

I choose both - drop weight off bike where sensible to do so given my weight, riding style and terrain, plus learn to ride faster and smoother. I have a hell of a lot of fun doing it too. Sorry to hear you're missing the boat.

Happy trolling.

 

[Upchuck]

Love it when someone smugly pulls the "newb" card to try to make themselves feel superior. You were saying something about elitist snobbery below? Gee Upchuck, can I please join your club?
That's what 99% of this this entire web site is about across all forums, in some form or another. Talk about having your head in the sand.

Sorry buddy. There's only room for one in my club and even I can't afford the dues. I'll let you know when there's an opening. I might be able to get you in if you post some detailed pics of your VP, ASR-SL and Riddler. Oh, and your address, work hours and where you hide the key to the garage would help. Yeah, that should do it.

I choose both - drop weight off bike where sensible to do so given my weight, riding style and terrain, plus learn to ride faster and smoother. I have a hell of a lot of fun doing it too. Sorry to hear you're missing the boat.

BOAT?! You mean you can afford a boat, too?! Damn, you guys are way too posh for me. I'll just take my measley two-wheeled contraption over to the Political-Socio-Economic-Religion board. Those guys are a lot more tolerant than youse guys, eh?

 

[drunkle]

How right you, I mean the fortune cookie, are...I mean is...or something like that.
Truer words were never spoken.

One I really liked was: One who gets offended by poke in the ribs, is offended by what he sees in himeself.

And this one: If you can't laugh at yourself, let others do it for you.

Boy, I should give up my day job and write Hallmark cards, or fortune cookies, or troll-posts.

almost forgot: it matters not the heights one reaches in cycling, for one is still a cyclist and therefore apt to be hit by a slurpee.

 

[Circlip]

Sorry buddy. There's only room for one in my club and even I can't afford the dues. I'll let you know when there's an opening. I might be able to get you in if you post some detailed pics of your VP, ASR-SL and Riddler. Oh, and your address, work hours and where you hide the key to the garage would help. Yeah, that should do it.

BOAT?! You mean you can afford a boat, too?! Damn, you guys are way too posh for me. I'll just take my measley two-wheeled contraption over to the Political-Socio-Economic-Religion board. Those guys are a lot more tolerant than youse guys, eh?

Hmmm... now that we're into comparing MTBR profiles, I see some curious tidbits on yours such as EC70 bars, 517 rims, etc. Frickin' hypocrite! Rhyno-Lites and some Azonic DH bars would have saved you major $$$ since you're not concerned by a little bit of extra weight. Just pedal harder, eh?

Bringing your intellect to this board is like taking a pocket knife to a gun fight.

Run along now junior.

 

[bike_freak]

I'm just going to ignore EVERYTHING you said, but what is in the 'restricted area', looks like a toilet??

 

[lowmach]

i too am curious about this restricted area


not sure whats in there, but i'm pretty sure i need one.

;-)


oh that must be where the real lite **** is.

BAAAAWWWWHHHHHHHH

no really man whats in the box!?

 

[Circlip]

no really man whats in the box!?

Must be his life-size Tammy Faye-Baker blow-up doll.

 

[Jersey]

thats where the puppies and candy are stored when not in the back of the minivan

 

[Upchuck]

I'm just going to ignore EVERYTHING you said, but what is in the 'restricted area', looks like a toilet??

Hate to admit it, but Circlip almost guessed correctly. I'll give you a clue: look closely at the "cabinet" and you should be able to figure it out...

 

[Circlip]

Hate to admit it, but Circlip almost guessed correctly. I'll give you a clue: look closely at the "cabinet" and you should be able to figure it out...

Air compressor and tank?

 

[Upchuck]

Air compressor and tank?

DING DING DING!!! Give the canuck a prize! What do we have for our contestant, Marv?
Well, Jim. How about a weekend supply of Canadian beer packed in a deluxe, genuine Canadian icebox?

But that's not all! We've also included winter transportation for those middle-of-the-night beer runs! Why here's Circlip and his pals heading out for more of Canada's finest!

So let's raise our glasses in tribute to our friends up north, and say a holiday prayer!
Our Lager,
Which art in barrels,
Hallowed be thy drink.
Thy will be drunk, (I will be drunk),
At home as in the tavern.
Give us this day our foamy head,
And forgive us our spillages,
As we forgive those who spill against us.
And lead us not to incarceration,
But deliver us from hangovers.
For thine is the beer,
The bitter and The lager.
Forever and ever,
Barmen.