I'm 41, 225 lbs, and it sounds like our riding preferences are similar. I chase after my son and his friends on some pretty rough trails and downhill runs but for the most part, leave the jumps and drops to them. Just bought a Cannondale Gemini 2000 about a month ago. Very happy with it so far. Great components and IMHO, excellent value for money. Weighs in at about 35-36 lbs and feels a lot like a trail bike, albeit with 7" + 7" of travel. Took me a while to get used to it after having ridden a 2.5" travel x-country hardtail for serveral years. However, I haven't ridden the hardtail since I got the Gemini because my new ride simply pedals great and is more fun to ride. I can now climb steep trails that I couldn't with the hardtail because the rear suspension allows the tire to remain hooked up. Then, when the trail points downhill it shows its stuff and the geometry and suspension sucks up just about everything.
You should be able to pick one up for $2500 or less. When I was trying to decide, I also looked seriously at the Chaparral and Bullit but they would have cost me $500 to $1000 more for a configuration similar to the Gemini.
Best of luck with your decision . . .