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Discussion Starter · #1 · (Edited)
Top ten reasons hillbillys shouldnt mountain bike;

10) Ridiculous wide brimmed hat cuases excessive wind friction and offers little crash protection.
9) Two cinder blocks in front yard not an adequate "work stand" for maintaining bieks.
8) Sqwealing brakes often cause embarrassing sexual arousal
7) Bike rack displaced by rocking chair on top of crappy pick up
6) Using spurs to motivate bike only jams rear cassette
5) Overalls and gardening gloves generally rejected by cycling communitie
4) Powerbar hasnt yet released Possum Flavor
3) Pick up truck full of chickens gets restless waiting at trailhead
2) Corn cob pipes dont come in metric sizes
1) Playing water bottle as "musical instrument" causes premature exhaustion, allowing wifecousin to kick your ass up a hill. Sucker.
 

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AdventureQuest said:
Top ten reasons hillbillys shouldnt mountain bike;

10) Ridiculous wide brimmed hat cuases excessive wind friction and offers little crash protection.
9) Two cinder blocks in front yard not an adequate "work stand" for maintaining bieks.
8) Sqwealing brakes often cause embarrassing sexual arousal
7) Bike rack displaced by rocking chair on top of crappy pick up
6) Using spurs to motivate bike only jams rear cassette
5) Overalls and gardening gloves generally rejected by cycling communitie
4) Powerbar hasnt yet released Possum Flavor
3) Pick up truck full of chickens gets restless waiting at trailhead
2) Corn cob pipes dont come in metric sizes
1) Playing water bottle as "musical instrument" causes premature exhaustion, allowing wifecousin to kick your ass up a hill. Sucker.
#11?... Riding partners hate dodging chew-spittle...

(When are they goin' to release them possum flavurd candy bars, anyhow?)
 
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