Mountain Bike Reviews Forum banner
1 - 20 of 25 Posts

·
Bite Me.
Joined
·
4,531 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
So, there I was at the local watering hole talking the usual jive about Turners and HL and TNT, linkage ratios, air vs. coil, trashing Ellsworth and such, you know, the typical holding forth, and this very fit looking hot girl walks in all dressed in riding clothes pushing a fully rigid single speed (only ONE tiny gear folks) when after about 5 minutes she leans over and says to me (and I quote):

"You know, it's not about the bike."

I was struck speechless. I mean, what kind of a sick world are we living in where someone could even contemplate making a comment like that? She's got to be making some kind of a joke I say to myself. So regaining a little composure I calmly say:

"Of course it's not just about the bike, there's also the GoreDuketm."

That was when she slapped me. Hard. In the face. WTF?!!!
What is that all about I wondered? I got the impression she was actually serious...It's not about the bike?!!! I noticed she was kind of sweaty, like she'd been working out or something, but it was sort an attractive shiny look, and she smelled kind of good too... Anyway, later that evening I just couldn't get her comment and her look out of my mind. It was really bugging me.... To the point that my usual nightly polishing of the rocker arms on my 5 Spot and Lemon Pledging the frame wasn't bringing me that same sense of well being I always get (we have had a huge amount of dust this spring).
I got to thinking.. What if it really isn't about the bike??? What if she's right, and people actually ride these things??? I had a sick feeling in my stomach, sort like looking at El Chingon in a Speedo, only not that bad. I started worrying, am I missing out on something? Is there a whole 'nother picture that I'm just not seeing? I figured my Homer buddies would know - so here it is - the question - is she right? Or am I just over-reacting? Thanks Homers,
signed - Confused:confused:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
9,331 Posts
Don't listen to that garbage. We all know that it is all about the bike or multiple bikes. This is very distressing. Did you at least get to touch her inappropriately after the slap?
 

·
gravity curmudgeon
Joined
·
1,502 Posts
Personally I find it hard to ride without a bike, but maybe that's just me. :rolleyes:

It's about the rider AND the bike, "man" and machine united as a team for purposes that can only come from the mind of the rider (or from a magazine). ;)
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,085 Posts
cutthroat said:
Lemon Pledging the frame
Lemon Pledge? You hack. :nono: How is that ever going to bring out the multi-layer luster? You've gotta go with clay to really get those babies to shine.
 

·
Bite Me.
Joined
·
4,531 Posts
Discussion Starter · #5 ·
If I use clay on my frame will that void the warranty?

I tried to cop a little in appropriate fondle on the way to floor but her Zefal in my groin nipped that in the bud.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,165 Posts
APB "hot Chick"

She wasn't happy that you spent all the time looking at her bike!
Is this the one? she look's angry.


 

·
Banned
Joined
·
4,278 Posts
miles e said:
Lemon Pledge? You hack. :nono: How is that ever going to bring out the multi-layer luster? You've gotta go with clay to really get those babies to shine.

Dont forget the wax . . . . . . . :)thumbsup: on the claybar treatment)

(and yes, I really do use it on my bike)
 

·
Bite Me.
Joined
·
4,531 Posts
Discussion Starter · #8 ·
For a tongue in cheek post this is starting to take a scary turn. Polishing products.... now why would the Homers focus on that one detail???
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
9,331 Posts
And it's only just started. As soon as I heard the word "claybar", I knew synthetic sealant layered on top on 24-hour-aged carnauba was next.
 

·
Bite Me.
Joined
·
4,531 Posts
Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Prof said:
She wasn't happy that you spent all the time looking at her bike!
Is this the one? she look's angry.


NO - she looked more like this - (sigh)
 

Attachments

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,165 Posts
"NO - she looked more like this - (sigh)"

Yup, I had a similar image in mind then I saw the boots on the girl out shopping and figured she was more likely to hit you.
 

·
Big Test Icycles
Joined
·
1,480 Posts
cutthroat said:
Anyway, later that evening I just couldn't get her comment and her look out of my mind. It was really bugging me.... To the point that my usual nightly polishing of the rocker ,
signed - Confused:confused:
So you go home, still thinking about this gal and start polishing the rocker. Maybe you need her to polish the rocker and you might not be so confused. LOL. Nothing better than a Polished Rocker :thumbsup:
 

·
Bite Me.
Joined
·
4,531 Posts
Discussion Starter · #15 ·
cowDawg said:
Personally I find it hard to ride without a bike, but maybe that's just me. :rolleyes:

It's about the rider AND the bike, "man" and machine united as a team for purposes that can only come from the mind of the rider (or from a magazine). ;)
Confucius say: "Bike but no ride - possible. Ride but no bike - impossible". You have much to learn grasshopper before you can snatch the XO shifter from my hand.
 

·
Time flies...
Joined
·
2,206 Posts
Not to worry Cutty....
1] she was a 'she'...
2] she was probably blonde.....somewhere....
3] her bike was a single speed....

= these clues would indicate that she doesn't have the ...intelligence... to even operate a gear shifter. Would be too confusing for her. Did you notice if she had to pedal backwards to apply the brakes?
Obviously, this particular female is, shall we say, mentally challenged. Short bus.
Therefore, her opinions aren't worth two dead flys.

Now had a smart chick been present during this altercation, say Dirty harriet or Su-ling, they would have surely kicked her sweaty a$$ all over that place.....just for GP....



...go on back to polishing yer thang and "be happy" :D
 

·
Bite Me.
Joined
·
4,531 Posts
Discussion Starter · #18 ·
Thanks guys - I feel better .. really. Tomorrow I'm gonna ride that bike on the Scout Trail, in my speedo, shouting "Get on my nugget pouch mamacita and BRING ON THE PAIN!!" Yeah!!

Actually I'm departing for 4 days of riding in new terrain in Southern CO - Ridgway area. Ride report to follow. Office closed, camp trailer packed - weekend has started - Elvis has left the building - ride on Homers:thumbsup:
 

·
Time flies...
Joined
·
2,206 Posts
Ridgway??

...south of Montrose?? I'll be looking for that report, as I was thinking that might be a nice place to live...


El C.... damn......:yikes:
 
1 - 20 of 25 Posts
Top