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61 Posts

Lying in bed with my wife watching Steven Colbert last night
Instep of my foot pressed lightly into the sole of her near foot
Feeling close
Drifting off to sleep as the musical guest comes on to end the show
Her hand drops lightly onto my shoulder
Fingertips massage this way and that
Hand slowly finger crawls across my chest
Burrows into my pit
Slips down my side
Back across my belly
Lingering a moment on my naval
Checking if I am asleep
Slides off my hip and cups my near cheek in palm
Climbing back on top fingers dance tenderly
Up one side and down the other
An appreciative response
Hand dives down between my legs
Delves beneath my butt and
Swiftly retreats from my body
“Mmmmmmmm,” I murmur “Why’d you stop”
“Looking for the remote” she replies
“Found It”

** Borrowed from a Richard Dreyfus joke in The Last laugh

125 Posts
Weddings were always the worst.

Every time I went to a wedding old people were looking and pushing at me, saying "You're next!" I never got over it.

Things sure have changed. Now, when I go to funerals, I poke at those same old people and exclaim "You're next!"

For some reason they don't find it amusing anymore. Oh well...
1881 - 1900 of 1907 Posts