Framepurple and double metal
Front Forkshok
Bottom Bracketsmooth but flapy kind of
Cranksi want to crank?
Chainringsholey but without niggers
Pedalsslippery
Front Derailleuryellow
Chainsuper triple
Rear Derailleurhard
Cogsetcogy
Skewersroast beef?
Spokesdeal
Rimsstury
Tubesno thanks
Tiresnone of those either
Brakesplastic
Seatpostsuper spike
Saddlebeastiality, yes please
Headsetif i have to
Stemwater
Handlebarslightweight and triple sub
Shiftersspinning
Brake Leversquadruple spinning
Bar Tapebar fight
Extrascookie with custom engineered eat guard


Dad from your house writes:

because my father beats me

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