Submitted by
Rashmaan
a Downhiller
from Rubicon City
Date Reviewed: December 13, 1999
Strengths: fits my style
Weaknesses: flexes too much, but then, I'm a clyde
Bottom Line:
I am jealous of people who are fast- they are deliberately trying to shaft me, i know it. They are all showing off, i know it and they are trying to sabotage me- sabotaging my equipment. I'll show them- those skinny riders. All they do is try to beat me-oh, that's all they do. Give me the wide downhill fireroad, I'll beat them and make them sorry. I like all the superlight parts and don't understand why they break- It couldn't possibly be that I am a Clyde- I'll buy more expensive and superlight parts to impress everyone- all those fast riders can shake in fear of my awesome wealth and superlight bike underneath my Clyde frame. I am the best, I deserve the best-I want to ride with you, but if you are fast, i will hate you and find some way to sabotage you. I laugh when the fast guys crash and you should be good to me because I have wealth and a superlight bike, despite physics and my pride. Oh, I am so jealous of lighter riders and how they ride fast and how they show off- just to me-I wish those skinnier and faster riders evil things in my head and tell everyone how evil they are.
Similar Products Used: everything expensive- i envy everyone, whois fast; no wait, I hate them
Bike Setup: all the superlight parts
Overall Rating:
Submitted by
Mordo the SuperGo
a Weekend Warrior
from Eleven for Eleven
Date Reviewed: December 13, 1999
Strengths: i can pound the downhill fireroad like no other beware, the wind can not stop me, down hill that is the physics that prevents my ascent, powers my descent
Weaknesses: i have no weaknesses
Bottom Line:
I am the conisseur of bikedom. My level of comprehesion is well above the mere mortals and I stand with a level of distinction and pride. I deserve it especially because of my pedigree and heritage. Sure, I am a Clyde, but I deserve the best even if it means a superlight frame. It flexes under my heft, but I am in command and you should respect my wealth and superiority. All those riders who are faster than me are purposely attempting to challenge my superiority, trying to defame me. This is especially true if they ride inferior equipment and if they are of normal physical dimensions. They have no right to ride faster than me nor to own better equipment than me. They think that they are better than me just because they are faster than me. I will challenge all who think that they are faster than me- they do it just to spite me-I know they do because that is what I try to do- do things out of spite. Also, those who don't talk to me are purposely not talking to me. I know that they are thinking bad things about me- I will find a way to get them-defame them and I will recruit my minions as a force against them. Because then, people will respect me like the deity that I am.
Strengths: Clydes power the downhill- slamming it big time.
Weaknesses: Clydes are Clydes- why fight it- they're slower than a regular guy, but get upset when they aren't good climbers- get a grip, man!
Bottom Line:
Clydes are Clydes- get real- any, ANY superlight part/frame will breeak and NO, you can't climb like Lance, but don't get all worked up in a headrush because of PHYSICS. Ride for fun- oh, what is that? You think smaller, lighter riders are 'giving you attitude-the shaaft' when they pass you- hey, were all out to have fun- but Clydes think it's all a race because they can't accept that they are Clydes. Oh, brother, ride your ability and most all, have fun- no need to compare yourself to others (jealousy) and to feel like you have to compete. 1 star for that Clyde jealousy attitude- you make everything ugly with your attitude- you're the only one with the attitude.
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